Planet Terror

I don't know, I've never been into these cheap, gory B-movies where quantity clearly wins over quality. And this is no exception. Yes, it's a trash movie. Yes, it was made by Robert Rodriguez. But it seems to me that these arguments are just being used by most to rationalise their five stars  in this shitfest that doesn't even deserve an average rating. Fortunately, the film at least has a basic template to stick to, pretty much okay characters, and most importantly a parodic undertone where it doesn't take itself seriously, so it was watchable. But I was expecting something completely different... (01/04/2023)

Maybe crazier and more disgusting than the first part, and that's saying something. It is clear what this piece wants to say, so it is basically impossible to describe its qualities, as it is a patchwork of bad movies. But the resulting product is even weirder, bolder, and more interesting, there are no limits or barriers here. Are you a fan? Great, you will have a good time. You aren’t? You will turn it off after five minutes. More likely after ten, because Fergie in white is worth seeing. (07/18/2008)

Filmed with love, humor, irony, detachment, and above all, joy. With every other shot, I had the image of an enthusiastic Robert Rodriguez bouncing around behind the camera and looking forward to the next take. And yet it occurred to me too often that the days when Robert was able to restrain his ideas and give them a form that didn't elicit protests of overcomplication and lack of taste were long gone. Yes, you can enjoy Planet Terror without necessarily liking it. It flies by, Bruce Willis occasionally takes a breather, Naveen Andrews delivers a great performance, and Freddy Rodriguez shoots so much it will make your head spin. Add to that perfect scenes like "the most badass character in the whole movie riding a children's motorcycle," and you'll find that the plot just doesn't stop. But it's a splatter film. And with that comes blood, slime, corpses, blisters, more slime, repulsiveness, twistedness, and an extra dose of slime on top of that. And that manages to bring down the entertaining ride to the level of a slightly below-average (albeit perfectly fast-paced) one-time viewing. (02/11/2008)

A proper homage to trash. For the uninitiated viewer, whose horizon in the horror genre ends at most somewhere around Count Dracula, this will be a "sick perversion" (in the words of my work colleague), while others will enjoy the tons of references and the irresistible depravity of Rodriguez's brainchild. I'm with Ish, I want more Grindhouse, Trey's machete-wielding avenger, werewolf SS-men, and a Thanksgiving slasher spree (including a trampoline)!! But I still like Tarantino's contribution to the project a bit better, because it's more personal and therefore more interesting. And definitely a big thanks to the Weinstein brothers who weren't afraid to put their money into this bold non-mainstream project. That they then unfortunately wept at the earnings is another matter. (10/23/2007)

Where Robert Rodriguez loses out to Quentin in terms of filmmaking, inventiveness, polished style, and form in general, he paradoxically gains in fun precisely because, unlike his colleague, he does not attempt to squeeze “that little bit more" from this genre than it has to offer. This is just a dumb D-movie, and it’s well aware of that, and thanks to exaggeration and reasonable duration it manages to entertain the entire time. (07/14/2007)