The Meg

A forgettable, average B-movie. It needed a director like Stephen Sommers or Joe Johnston, who would make such deliberately silly subject matter into a better spectacle. John Turtletaub is not very good.____P.S. The Czech subtitles by Kateřina Hámova are once again horrendous. No, “squid" really isn't “octopus," and there were plenty of other mistakes as well. (08/22/2018)

Chinese people like American blockbusters, yet at the same time they don't have the same demands from them as the American market. And movie studios realize that targeting a multi-million dollar market, which by virtue of the absence of any cultural alternative has inherently easier movie motives, is the way to a giant vault above the city where they can jump into a pile of dollars in a one-piece bathing suit. The Great Wall, starring Matt Damon, was a similar attempt at such a breakthrough, and it lived up to the expectations of a colorful, passionate, expensive action movie starring an American superstar. The Meg is aimed purely at the Chinese market, just by the way the actors are forced to act... Chinese. Excessive emotional expression, unnecessary gestures, sweeping gesticulations, plus the constant cuts to the people who are currently speaking. Not to mention a funny attempt to prove the moral superiority of the Chinese crew members over everyone else with their constant self-sacrifice or impassioned speeches about how man is hurting nature. I have no reason not to think that the disjointed scene where the American millionaire, who had been behaving quite normally – helping characters in trouble etc. – now decides to kill all the characters with Semtex was an afterthought, imposed by the demands of the Chinese production company. Why did there have to be some helicopters exploding completely randomly? Because Chinese audiences like exploding helicopters. We might just as well ask why the actress Ruby Rose had her tattoos repainted in the makeup room into Chinese visuals. Could it perhaps be because tattooed crosses aren't exactly popular with the Chinese? The Warners are betting that audiences will adapt to whatever succeeds in China, for which they deserve no more than one star. A perfectly clean equation of the film and the product. (11/13/2018)

Entertaining idiocy about a bloodthirsty prehistoric shark, in which Statham sings the same tune as Dory in Finding Nemo. The tricks are solid and the B-movie screenplay is supported by essential crutches such as a whining black guy, a bothersome billionaire and the requisite love story. But the movie also has a British joker up its sleeve who used to be a professional swimmer and saves everything, including the movie. I enjoyed it. (10/04/2019)

MEG runs mostly on two things: the predictable problem with accessibility, which makes the potentially adrenaline-pumping and thrilling premise suffer from constant downplaying and visual softness; and the attempts to humanize the main characters, which mostly look terribly ridiculous – we have the most classic cast: from a doctor to a whiny black man to a pretty scientist, and of course we have Jason Statham, who is initially mired in booze and remorse, but for most of the film he's an incredibly cool, fearless superhero, so that the viewer gradually comes to see the shark not as a terrible threat, but as someone looking forward to Jason’s next heroic stunt. But I’m cool with it. MEG lost any A-grade ambitions with the announcement of the creative team, and the production poured the 150 million into deliberately dumbed-down and great-looking entertainment where everybody es having plenty of fun (Statham pulls it off outrageously, Turteltaub occasionally delights with inventive action or suspenseful point-of-view shots), and if it weren't for the aforementioned attempt at personal conflicts and the associated boring dialogue, the film would have flown by. Making a family film with a bloodthirsty shark is no joke, and the creators quite managed it. Even the dog survives in the end. 60% (08/15/2018)

I was afraid it would turn out to be like the one real disaster this summer, Skyscraper (I’m sorry to talk about it this way, but it was almost a catastrophe), but in the end, it turned out much better than I expected. Maybe Statham helped, whom I welcomed as the main character after a long break; he fit his role quite well, and his English, more precisely, his London accent sounded almost funny at times (so it was entertaining). In terms of the story, it’s not much, let’s be realistic, but unlike Skyscraper, this started with a lighter tone and ended that way too (Skyscraper was trying to be too serious). The CGI was very decent, with a few scenes really polished to the smallest detail, but given the budget, it would be sad if it didn’t look this way in the end. The ending was quite sugary; personally, I would have turned up the intensity (overall, you won’t see much blood, which is a bit disappointing considering it’s a movie with a giant shark). But so be it. Finally, I want to say that it bothers me a bit that the target audience for the film is once again Asia, but we can’t blame the film for that (and actually, the studios in general). Not accepting those hefty financial injections from the East would probably be a sin, that must be acknowledged. I give it 67%. (11/28/2018)